


Birthmark

by alexygalexy



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Gen, M/M, it could be general teen boy fuckery, listen it could be gay, your choice
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-29
Updated: 2016-07-29
Packaged: 2018-07-27 11:47:21
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,191
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7616872
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/alexygalexy/pseuds/alexygalexy
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>This is borderline crack fic. It's 3:56 am. </p><p>Lance has a very important piece of information about Keith that has to be delivered. Right. Now.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Birthmark

**Author's Note:**

> Slight warning for a naked butt sighting but thats as nsfw as it gets.

Lance was sprinting down the hall, his bare feet slapping on the cold floor of the castle. He left a trail of water drops behind him as he whipped his head side to side, searching the various side corridors for the faint lights that would indicate his friends already working (at what Lance thought to be an absolutely ungodly hour of the morning) deep in the castle's tech systems. 

He craned his head to the left as he ran past and open archway, spotting the pulsing glow of Hunk’s soldering iron not too far inside. He spun on his heels, almost slipping from the water, then launched himself down the hall.

“Pidge! Hunk! Guys! Are you in here? I have some extremely important information to tell you. This is vital. You guys. You guys! Listen to me, ok seriously, listen. Are you list-”

“Yes, Lance,” droned Pidge, with more edge than should’ve been humanly possible. “We’re listening.” Lance doubted the sincerity of their statement, given that they hadn’t even lifted their head out of the mess of wires trailing out of a panel in the wall. 

“No, but guys, are you _listening?_ ”

“Yeah buddy,” came Hunk’s muffled voice from behind his welding helmet. “We’re here.”

“Are you sure, ‘cause this is really important,” Lance emphasized. 

“Clearly,” Pidge seethed, “as you didn’t even have time to properly dry off before you came running to deliver your message, as well as drip your shower water _all over my electrical EQUIPMENT!_ ” 

Lance pouted at Pidge’s rising tone of voice, crossing his arms and sitting into his hip as he scowled at the youngest of the bunch. If there was anything Lance could do, it was sass back. This time, though, the excitement of what he had to say overpowered any cheekiness he might’ve had. A smile crept back into his face and Hunk could’ve sworn the kid was bouncing on his toes in anticipation as he prepared to finally spill. Hunk’s mask barely had an eye slit for vision, but Lance could still see him roll his eyes before giving into Lance’s demands. 

“Tell us, Lance. What is it this time.”

“Keith has a … K-keith has a … a-” Laughter spilled over into his words, tripping him up as he tried to share what was, apparently, some of the funniest information in the galaxy.

Pidge removed their head from the jungle of wires in order to stare Lance in the eyes. “Keith has a w h a t, Lance.”

“He has a b-birthmark. On his Ass.” Lance doubled over, wheezing, before bringing his now red face back up to meet Pidge eyes and add, “It looks like a cherry! Right on his ass cheek, guys. Keith has got. A fruity ass.”

He was still talking, but at this point it was all unintelligible garble. Lance dropped to the floor with his hands around his sides, narrowly missing Pidge’s toolbox, tears physically coming to his eyes with the sheer hilarity of the statement he had just revealed.

Hunk turned his blowtorch off and lifted up his mask, letting out a chuckle. “I’ve got to hand it to you Lance. That is pretty funny.”

Lance sent an agreement cackle in Hunk’s direction. 

Pidge, despite their efforts to remain impervious to Lance’s constant dumb jokes, smirked at the revelation. But before the smile had completely faded from their face, their eyes widened behind their glasses. 

“Lance,” Pidge started. “How exactly did you find this information out?”

Lance’s face was still red, but now for a far different reason. 

“Well. Um. About that…” he stuttered. 

Pidge was grinning evilly now. This story was actually going to be worth stopping their work for. “Pray, tell us. Everything.”

Lance gulped. Then, steeling his arms against his now-crossed legs, he began to talk.

“See now, I was in the shower, right? Minding my own business. Chilling. Cleansing. Maybe singing a little. Or a lot. Anyways, I’m in the shower, doing my thing, and I _guess_ Keith came in and I didn’t hear him - “

“Couldn’t figure why,” mumbled Hunk. Having shared a room with Lance back at the garrison, he was all too familiar with Lance’s full-volume shower concerts.

“ Yeah, so I finish up in the shower right and he’s in there but I don’t know he's in there, so I just open the shower curtain and he’s right there. Right there. I’m telling you guys. Can you imagine that?”

Pidge gagged.

Hunk figured Lance had probably already imagined that.

“But not only is he right there, he’s right there in his pajamas. And now I don’t know if you’ve ever seen him in his pajamas, but holy shit you guys. Short-shorts. That alone in itself is fucking amazing but I’m getting side tracked. He’s wearing bright red short shorts. Like eighties NBA-style short-shorts. You know the ones. Did I mention how close he is to me? He’s like right in front of the shower stall, ok, like right there. So close. So. Close. And then guess what he does. Guess what he fucking does you guys. He bends down. Like ass to the sky, bends down. Grabbing his towel off the floor or something, I don’t know. I don’t care. All I’m thinking is his ass is directly in my face, and like, I’m not complaining cause it’s not a bad ass, pretty good ass actually. Damn. Guess those training sessions did him some good cause DAMN. I mean I know the Voltron suits are form fitting but it is so different in person. And in your face. So he’s bending down and these tiny ass shorts are riding up and it’s right there, this little round birthmark, exactly like a cherry. Kinda cute actually. Like I said, not a bad ass. And I mean after that he stood back up and I got out of the shower in my towel and everything and I guess he seriously had no idea, thank god honestly, but you guys, I came straight here cause you guys needed to - Pidge. Why do you look like that. Why are you smiling like that. Pidge.”

Pidge’s smile was wider than Lance had ever seen it; and far, far more mischievous. Lance didn’t dare to follow Pidge’s gaze to whatever was above him. He didn’t have to. He felt the drop of shower water drip down onto his head. He turned around, painstakingly slow, a guilty blush filling his entire face. 

“H-hey, Keith,” Lance stammered at the familiar face, now ringed with still wet and slightly curly shower hair. 

“So I’ve got a nice ass, huh?”

“H-how long have you been there?” Lance squeaked out.

“Long enough,” Keith drawled, reveling in Lance’s embarrassment.

“I-I-I…..” Lance sputtered. “I….I……..I’m going now.”

Hunk, Pidge, and Keith’s maniacal laughter echoed after Lance as he sprinted back down the hall of the castle, his bare feet still slapping the floor with a dull thud. The sound was similar enough to Pidge and Hunk’s high five that Lance didn’t notice that when it happened. 

However, he couldn’t truthfully say he didn’t catch Keith remarking, “Yeah, I _definitely_ knew Lance was in there.”

**Author's Note:**

> thanks to @pryory on tumblr for talking to me about keith in soffe sport shorts because i couldn't get it out of my head and thats how Keith "Fruity Ass" Kogane was born


End file.
